August 10, 2011

How to : Be an absolutely NOT annoying Facebook user 101.

1. Always have an album of pictures with minimum of 500 self-shot pictures of yourself (must have at least 50 pictures where you in the same outfit same place same hair where your head is tilted slightly more than the other in every picture/different facial expression), and name the album "Me~" (must have ~, if not ^^ also can). It can otherwise be creatively named like "Me, myself, and i", "It's all about me", or however you want it to be, but it MUST have the word ME.

In this album, you can also insert another 10 or 20 or 90 pictures of yourself, edited using the infamous software Mei Tu Xiu Xiu. Thus, creating super chio pictures as such.

The end results must NOT look anything like your original self hor. Must edit to the extent that your mother also can't recognise you okay?

Can add a few random English words too if you want. It's okay if it doesn't make any sense or grammatically incorrect. Another alternative is to add some animated chinese words with fake bling, it makes your picture look extra classy.

OR YOU CAN JUST ADD EVERYTHING AVAILABLE IN THE SOFTWARE cos it's free mah.

2. If you just went to college to further your studies and so happens your course requires you to do presentation in front of the class, and requires you to wear formal cloth, you must have a specific album for it.

Doesn't matter if it's all individual shots,
The caption must be "Me in formal cloth" hor. Or "First time wear formal ^.^"

You can choose to take it using your reflection in the mirror or in the bathroom (your own or the ones in your campus). Whichever you feel more comfortable with is fine.

Or if you already have 146 self-shot photos of yourself in formal cloth, you can get your entire group to take a picture with you so that you can upload it on Facebook. People who never had a chance to wear formal cloth will definitely be jealous of you.


Reminder : Must spell clothes as 'cloth' okay if not your whole album doesn't qualify!

3.Okay this one applies to both working young adults and students.
For an example, if you go to University of WTF-ness, (UWTF), then title of album must be "UWTF life~" (again, must have ~). And in that album, make sure everyone have their student cards around their neck.
Can make super kawaii poses if you want regardless of gender.

On the other hand, if you're working.. or you went to somewhere other than your hometown to study, for example Tanjung OMG, then you can have pictures of yourself, or with your new friends all compiled up in an album named "Tanjung OMG life~".

4. Get a new haircut. Doesn't matter if it's a drastic change or a subtle change. Janji it's a new hairstyle. And then, as usual, take 720 (360x2, or more) pictures of yourself, but must have at least one picture from different angle. Horizontally and diagonally ya.

Title of album : New hairstyle, new life~
Or if your new hairstyle coincides with the new year, it can be "New hairstyle, new year, new life" because your hairstyle can totally change your life! It's true one okay. You know, like how you used to see with both your eyes and now you're only left with one eye?
See the change in your life?

5. Occasionally change your names so that your friends will not recognise you, thinking they accidentally added a fruit into their friends' list.



You can also put fictional characters as your profile picture to go with your fictional names so that anime lovers will think that their favourite characters came to live and added them on Facebook.


And when you decide to get into a relationship, you and your partner can change your Facebook names to something identical or similar so that the whole world will know that you're deeply in love with each other by having similar Facebook names. Or you can just ask them to add this very popular word to his/her name : 

Bii

The special thing about this word is................. You can place them wherever you want it!!
You can either place it in front of your name: 
In the middle :

 Or at the back :

So versatile right?? In fact, you know what, it sounds so cool and unique i think i want to change my name too! How about this?

I should totally win the award for the best Facebook name x)


Okay that's all for now, i hope How to : Be an absolutely NOT annoying Facebook user 101 has helped you tremendously in your attempt to be an absolutely NOT annoying friend on Facebook (:

Have a nice day!


Note : This post has been created only for the purpose of entertainment and has no means whatsoever to offend any Facebook users out there. 


Got problem then learn how to take a joke lightly kthxbye

5 comments:

drunkwithcaffeine said...

HAHAHAHAHHAHA!! OMG.. I love you. XD

LaQToN said...

ooowh yeah fiona, finally a post that rili makes me laugh. lulzy

RaYster said...

I sense sarcasm. lOl

Bull Poop said...

This is SOOOOOOOOOO true!!!

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!