He helped.

I woke at 0730 today, hoping that i can study as much as possible today. Buuuuut, as u know, by 0800 my stomach was grumbling, and i went downstairs in search of food. And then my parents brought me out for breakfast instead, and there came marketing, and errands. I only got to get home at about 10 something. Sigh. Study plans disrupted. But not my fault,right? So i'll start now, not too late.

After an hour or so,i came downstairs for a study break. Grabbed a yakult, and i heard my dad's Wira coming in. Followed by a very painful cry by one of my Milo's pups. Rushed out at the speed of lightning, frantically searching where did the Sound came from. Well, i very well know what might have happened already, knowing that my dad's not used to coming in to a house compound with pups walking around in kl. I blame myself for not caging them up when my dad's around. But at that moment, i was filled with both rage and heartbrokenness.

Looking at him, crying so loudly there, i couldn't hold in the tears. It was like my few months old son was knocked down by a huge tractor. Luckily Milo brought him to the side, my smart Milo. I stroked his head, calmed him down, and he stopped crying. Like omg. I think the pain was so unbearable that he urinated a little. My heart was shattered into a million and one pieces, my eyes were drenched in tears.

His siblings were all surrounding him and one of them accidentally kicked his bad leg, he cried. If he were able to cry tears, i'm sure his eyes will be swelled up by now. I sat beside him for quite a moment, thinking hard what to do. The vet's closed on saturdays, and i'm feeling so useless. I could only stroke him gently to calm him down.

Then, very very slowly n carefully, i cupped him up and put him at the other side of the house. He laid there, like a crash victim in the ER. I looked at him, and i cried again remembering that being a male, he was the most active one among his siblings.

After a while, he tried to stand up and my heart literally skipped a beat. Though wobbly and shaky, he stood up, on 3 legs. I cried, foreseeing his future like some of the stray dogs i've seen walking on 3 legs. His sister came n lick him, and fell on his bad leg, and he cried. I cried again. I helped him up, and kept his sisters away from him. He limped himself to the cage, but unable to get in like how he used to.

I gently lifted him up and placed him inside the cage. He tried to walk, but because the floor in the cage was uneven, he fell. This was really heart throbbing. I literally wanna punch myself. I took him out, placed him in a corder, found some even planks n placed them in the cage so he could walk properly. When he was inside again, he limped himself to a corner n Laid there. I got a small bowl n filled it up with water n placed it next to him. I sat there, looking at him, for about half an hour.

After that, i gave the rest of the family a bath, just to occupy myself while keeping an eye on the poor guy. I checked on him one last time before i went up and locked myself in the room. I opened my glass door wide open so that i can hear him if anything is wrong, or if he needs me, lol like a nurse button.

Obviously,i couldn't study. I kept worrying that he'll be limping for the rest of his life. I prayed, i prayed hard. I begged the Lord to place His healing hands over the pup's poor leg. Then i reluctantly did some PA. Whenever i hear the pups making noise i'd rush down to see him. I was quiet during lunch. I was depressed. But apparently during their lunch, his mood was beginning to feel better, since he was wagging his tail. I sat there for another 15 mins before going in again. This time, he could very lightly straighten his bad leg to gain stability during his meal.

I thanked God for helping him heal, bit by bit. And i prayed again. At times like this, i will be religiously praying. And i hated myself for having such an attitude, using God only when i needed him. But He was faithful, He answered my prayers. God,i love Him to death! I promise i'll be praying more often =)

By late evening, i went out to see them again. Cos i opened the cage door to let Milo go in and nurse him, i left the door ajar in case Milo wants to come out. Boy, was i filled with joy when they came and see me when i opened the door. All 4 pups were there =) it seems like they've got their mum's habit, to come to the front do whenever they hear the door chime (which i think was very annoying).

At a glance, u might think that he's walking fine already. But if u sat there n look closely like i did, u'd see that he's actually placing his bad leg very very lightly on the floor, instead of really stepping on the floor. Still, i thank God for healing him up to this state.

At night, i watched a movie n went on fb for awhile. Before i went up, i peeped through the curtains to see the pups one last time before going upstairs and started blogging. In the noon, i felt so depressed i wanted to find someone to talk to real badly. But when i thought of it, if i were to tell someone what happened, i'll just get comforted, which is the last thing that i wanted right then.
And i don't feel like blogging at that moment, so i kept it all, till now.

Someone asked y am i being so emo nowadays. Yeah i was damn emo today, but not 'nowadays' that's for sure. It's just the stpm's-drawing-near-but-i'm-still-not-studying-seriously thing. I think. Haha. Anyways, it was a mixed feeling when i was writing this super long post. At the beginning it was teary, but towards the end i got better =) praise the Lord, he saved the day! Imma bring my grandpup to the vet tomorrow, after church, just to make sure.

I didn't bring him to the vet today, but i asked for the greatest Healer's help today. At least now i don't feel so useless =)